From a reader on giving:
Today's note to my extended family....
Greetings from the Western Front.
Hi all. It is that time of the year when I'm inclined to focus
on matters financial. In this instance, inheritances and such
things.
Take a close read of this link:
https://www.boldin.com/retirement/average-inheritance-how-much-are-retirees-leaving-to-heirs/
Forget about the "average" and focus on the "median". Then
reflect upon the current value of ***, Inc. and the cash each of
us has been fortunate to have received over the last several
years.
Obviously each of us has been unbelievably blessed and, with
any luck at all, will continue to exceed the median. You are
all "winners" in the lottery of life.
However, this brings with it an unwritten obligation. Being
far more fortunate than the "average bear", it is incumbent upon
each of us to support those less fortunate.
In this Christmas season of sharing, I'm asking each of you to
look deeply into your soul, count your blessings and do the
right thing~
Merry Christmas.
*******************
My reply: "Indeed."
*********************
The reader's reply:Indeed!
I'm pretty sure this notion isn't exactly in sync with your
earlier postings stating, (in effect) "the best charity is to
family".
While I agree with the objective, I wonder at what point it is no
longer pertinent.
My guess is that your extended family should, could, and probably
does, contribute to the unwashed masses far more than you'll ever
confess to!
That's what I'm thinking about the goodness of mankind!
**********************
My reply:
That's a great question ... when does it become no longer pertinent?
Forever and ever folks have talked about "saving for retirement."
I have always hated that concept. I never want to retire. I want to stay active until "the end."
My
son-in-law engaged his two adult daughters and me into taking a course
on personal finance, and again, the theme was "saving (or investing) for
retirement."
I had an epiphany during that home-made course (based on the BYU course in personal finance).
An
aside: the BYU course on personal finance is centered on giving,
tithing. And the BYU course is the course used by the Harvard Business
School as a requirement for all first year students.
The
epiphany: for me, the goal is not "saving (investing) for retirement."
The goal is to become financially independent -- have enough passive
income / mailbox money -- to do the things one wants to do and not have
to worry about money.
In
a roundabout way, in which I cannot articulate, it's the same thing
when it comes to answering your question, "at what point does limiting
one's charity to one's extended family" becomes no longer pertinent?
"My
extended family" extends well beyond blood relatives and in-laws. The
number of folks I remember with gifts (not always money -- because some
are not allowed to accept money as gifts) continues to expand.
Recently
I sent a check to a friend of the family going to college whose father
gives him little/no financial support. Long story how I met him. The
first time ever I got a note from the bank that the check seemed
suspicious when the individual came into to cash the cash, and wanted to
verify if I wrote the check. I had, and the check cleared. First time
it ever happened, and it was because the check was significantly larger
than what I regularly write.
I
give -- in cash -- a significant amount of money every month to an
elementary school teacher -- another long story -- she is incredibly
thankful for the money, and neither of us really understand why or how
this happened. But I've been doing this for two or three years now and
my plan is to increase the amount that teacher gets and to continue it
as long as I live. I may include in her in "instructions to to the
executor of my will." She's not "family" in the true sense of the word
but she is certainly "family" to me.
My
"giving" is year-round, the season does not make a big difference -- in
fact, I have come to dislike the emphasis on celebrities serving one
dinner a year to the homeless (which we see every Thanksgiving).
The
biggest impediment to giving money by check to large, well-known,
charities (including political parties, PETA, etc) is the "mailing list"
phenomenon. I would like to donate to Wikipedia but I don't want to end
up on their "mailing list."
My
father, RIP, was an incredible philanthropist, but incredibly gullible.
He gave enough money -- and this is a true story -- he was told there
is a girl's dormitory in some African country that has name on the
dormitory. One of my sisters had to actually threaten Lutheran Services
with a court order to "cease and desist" meeting with our dad for
continued contributions. Had she not stepped in -- no one in the family
he was doing this -- he would have bankrupted the family.
The
amount of "good work" that can be done by the billionaires in this
country is a much bigger story. I recently pointed that out on the blog.
Buffett says he plans to give away 90%+ of his wealth.
From November 26, 2024, on the blog:
Philanthropy: at this rate, Buffett will be 150 years old before he gives away his billions.
Yesterday,
it was announced Buffett gave $1.5 billion in BRK stock to his family's
charitable foundations. As of October, 2024, Buffett's estimated net
worth was $149.7 billion. I guess, like "regular" Americans, it's
emotionally difficult to give up one's legacy.
My
wife gives a significant amount of money to a family in California that
is really, really, really distantly related to us. Another long story.
Makes all the difference to them -- last year they wrote to tell us they
were able to afford a Christmas present the 9-year-old really, really
wanted because of my wife's generosity.
I wouldn't expect to get that kind of feedback from Wiki. I would expect to get put on a "mailing list."
So many stories I could tell about "giving." But I've rambled long enough.
Oh,
which reminds me, if one really wants to talk about annual giving, one
should see what US Air Force members do when it comes to charity. I
assume their method is used by the entire DOD, but I only know about the
USAF. That's another huge (positive) story about giving, in which I
fully participated.
But, as noted, charity begins at home. My home is getting larger and larger -- see next two examples ...
One
last note: I do bring in boxes of yogurt to my dentist and his staff on
a regular basis (not quite weekly but at least monthly) -- they don't
accept my dental insurance (from my Air Force medical / dental insurance
plan) and dental work can be incredibly expensive without insurance --
but they helped me when I had a dental emergency -- and I needed a
dentist quickly -- and like the mouse that removed the thorn from the
lion's paw, I've become their mouse, bringing them yogurt. LOL. And,
yes, the bill was incredibly expensive -- but worth every penny.
On,
and I bring in donuts on a regular basis to the Firestone service
center who takes care of our cars. Trivia, but it all adds up.
Bruce
This note not read/re-read for typographical or content errors.
